Mayra Martinez's story isn't just about overcoming obstacles; it's a beacon of hope that illuminates the strength of the human spirit. Join us on an emotional journey with the tenacious founder of M-squared Talent Solutions, as she shares her battle with the mysterious ailment, porphyria, and how it reshaped her life and career in the electrical industry. Through her narrative, we uncover the delicate dance between showing vulnerability and maintaining professionalism, and the profound impact this balance has on our personal growth and workplace dynamics.
As we peel back the layers of Mayra's experiences, we grasp the true essence of community and the role it plays in our lives. Her story is a powerful reminder of the importance of self-care and setting boundaries, especially when the going gets tough. Mayra’s transformation from a high-level executive to a champion of a healthier work culture showcases how personal health crises can catalyze a movement towards change, not just for oneself but for an entire industry. This episode is a commitment to those struggling to find balance—offering strategies and real-life examples of how to prioritize well-being alongside professional success.
Wrapping up, we extend our circle by highlighting the collective strength found in sharing our struggles. The upcoming accounts from our community, including a young electrician father navigating parenthood and career, further cement the notion that together, we are stronger. We celebrate the unsung heroes like Lance, Wilson, Irene, and Sergio, who have joined the quest to build a nurturing electrical community. Their stories, along with Maida's, are a testament to the power of camaraderie and the lasting legacy of resilience and compassion we can leave behind.
Connect with Mayra at:
https://www.msquared.biz/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/mayrafmartinez/
https://calendly.com/mmartinez-m2
Check out this compassionate approach to Continuous Improvement:
https://www.depthbuilder.com/Micro-Learning-Experience
Sign up for Your Monday Morning Hug:
https://www.linkedin.com/build-relation/newsletter-follow?entityUrn=7147552350830833665
00:00 Introduction to Mayra's Journey: Overcoming Adversity
00:54 Deep Dive into Vulnerability and Professionalism
01:14 The Power of Sacrifice and Community Support
03:38 Embracing Vulnerability: Mayra's Personal and Professional Transformation
11:06 The Harrowing Tale of Mayra's Fight for Life
21:11 The Turning Point: Choosing Life Over Death
23:42 Lessons Learned: The Importance of Self-Care and Leadership
26:42 A Journey of Self-Discovery and Family Involvement
26:57 Embracing a New Way of Living: Insights and Awe from the Next Generation
27:43 The Power of Involving Your Children in Your Personal Growth
28:35 From Crisis to Self-Care: Learning to Love Yourself
29:54 Practical Steps Towards Self-Love and Balance
30:44 The Importance of Sleep, Journaling, and Digital Detox for Well-being
34:01 Building a Support System and Accountability for Personal Growth
37:42 The Transformation from Corporate Executive to Entrepreneur
49:02 Creating a Legacy: Building a Community for Electrical Professionals
51:39 Reflections on Living a Life by Design
52:43 Gratitude and Shoutouts: The Power of Community Support
00:00 - Finding Purpose Through Adversity
03:38 - Sharing Vulnerability
11:06 - Medical Mystery and Courageous Determination
23:08 - Prioritizing Self-Care and Balance
37:04 - Honoring Yourself and Finding Balance
50:31 - Building a Meaningful Electrical Community
54:15 - Recovery Journey With Wilson
Oh, that is Miss Maida Martinez, who is a giant, a Titan, and her story is one of finding her purpose in adversity. And, maida, if you're out there right now, I know you're taking care of yourself and I'm glad that you are being kind to yourself. So, folks, lnm family, she is in the middle of continuing to work through the adversity that she's been dealing with like her whole life. So, if you can't tell, this conversation is gonna be pretty deep. We learn a lot of a major, major life and death struggle that Maida has been contending with or contended with at first and now is currently working to maintain and win the battles so that eventually she can win the war. And in terms of the war, I think she's winning it, like she's out there contributing in big and deep and meaningful ways.
She shares about the conflict between vulnerability and professionalism and you've probably felt it For some reason in the workspace we get in this mindset or this way of operating that feels like we have to be less human. And guess what, you ain't the only one that feels that way. She's felt like that too. We also talk about the sacrifice of success, right, like what does it take? What do we have to sacrifice in order to achieve the things we want to achieve or contribute in the ways we want to contribute. Folks, if you don't know, I think you do, but if you don't know, for every goal that you have, for every new experience, new lesson, new accomplishment, you're going to have to stop doing something and that is called sacrifice. And we also kind of get into the value, the powerful reverberating energy that comes from community. She's got her electrical community that is growing. Y'all know LNM family and NoBS tribe members. We got some community stuff going on and I think the most valuable thing about community is that as you grow, we all grow. As one grows, we all grow. There's this thing reciprocal propulsion that gets generated when we're speaking into each other's lives. You allow me, or invite me, into speaking to your life, I allow you and invite you to speak into my life and we continue to contribute to each other's path and we're getting to become the promise we're intended to be, faster than we could have ever expected.
And speaking about pouring into one another's life, I want to give a shout out to Miss Lynn Marie Scrivano, who left me a message on the YouTube. She sent a comment and she said keep doing things the way you're doing them. So, lynn Marie, thank you so much for that. Folks, if you ain't connected with her on the LinkedIn or the Instagram, insta's probably the best place to go, cause she's got all kinds of like really cool content. Check her out. She's amazing. But she was replying.
She made a comment on my one of my vid letters, my monthly vid letters and like two things all my creator friends out there, you know. You know how lonely you get sometimes when you put something out there and nobody says anything, and how exciting and meaningful it is for somebody to make a comment. So thank you, lynn Marie, for that and also for your continued support. You have been there supporting me and the DMs and giving me motivation and sustenance to continue going forward, and so I'm gonna keep going forward, just like you suggested, ma'am. And all right, here we go on to Miss Maida Martinez. What is going on? My people, I have a super awesome guest who I've actually had to spend time on the camera with. I think this might be our third time. Now, miss Maida Martinez, with M-squared, did I get it right?
That's right. M-squared talent solutions.
M-squared talent solutions, how you doing today, miss Maida.
Doing wonderful. Thank you very much. Thank you so much for having me, Jessie. I really appreciate it.
Oh, man, after we did the decentralized conference, I got to hear some of your story and even before that, I think the first time you and I talked and just watching your messaging on LinkedIn, I said, man, this person is awesome. Then, of course, lance I think maybe the connection came through Lance, I'm not exactly sure, but Lance is awesome. So I was like man, if they're friends, like I, gotta meet this person. And so far, everything that I've been able to catch on the socials, on the LinkedIn, is like, yeah, I mean, this is the type of human being that I think another, a lot of people really are looking for and would benefit from hearing from your story. So the first question I think that I'm curious about is your life, your world on social media. Is that something that you always knew you were gonna do, or what was the origin of that?
No, actually I have been on social media really only the last 18 years, but it was really strictly professional. It was never sharing anything personal, none of that. And then this craziness happened. Where I was, I experienced my near-death experience and I had people from all over the world that were interested in the story, mostly because it went viral the 24 hours. Once I was given 24 hours to live, it went viral through my church ministry. People just knew to start praying based on my face going viral. And then it just happened by fate where people just wanted to know, and it was just so much easier to just have one channel and say here you go. You wanna know what's going on? Visit here or follow the hashtag and it will be so much easier.
And it was really what prompted sharing a little bit more of that vulnerability that typically most people wouldn't want to share, especially being a high-level executive within an organization. I thought about it twice, jesse, do I wanna put this information out there, but you know what? At the end of the day, I think it has helped more people than the opposite. So I believe that it was all meant to be so that others could be blessed in the process of seeing how crazy this whole entire journey has been. It's been nuts. If you would have told me I was gonna end up living a book basically living I feel like a character from a book. Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't have believed it, but I'm very grateful for that.
Wow, that's so amazing. So the one thing, the one that went viral, was that a post that you made or was just the word got out?
Yeah, it was actually my senior pastor from the East Coast. We had actually, at that point, had not been to his church for eight years because we relocated from Virginia to California. But when my husband notified him that I was in critical condition and I needed a miracle, I needed prayer, the whole entire congregation and his whole entire network just started literally talking about my Amartina's and it just went everywhere and I'm so beyond grateful that he took the initiative and from there so many other people were sharing. People started following me as a result of wanting to know what happened within those 24 hours.
Oh, my goodness, okay, and so, obviously, within those 24 hours, we're gonna talk a little bit about that, if you're comfortable with it. You're not thinking about followers, right? Woo?
let it all.
There's like more important stuff going on, but after the fact, like the cat was out of the bag, it was out there in the world. What was that experience like?
To some degree as a professional. It was daunting because all the sudden now I felt like a failure and then, coming out of the worst, you could possibly imagine where I'm battling for my life and the first thing that comes to my mind is my employer is gonna think that I'm damaged goods which, by the way, unfortunately it's just business. I became yet another number, versus what we unfortunately constantly hear within companies. Oh, we're family. We're family up until we need to drop you.
Yes so maybe that being in the back of my head, just feeling judged, feeling vulnerable, do I want to be open about what's really happening and I made a decision that I was not going to care to be that transparent to show the good, the bad and the ugly of my whole entire journey. And I'm grateful, very grateful, that many people have stopped to say hey, thanks for sharing, because it's very difficult and you and I can have this conversation because I've heard you talk about it openly as well. But it hasn't been easy for you to be vulnerable, to let your guard down and a lot of times is to let go the thinking that has been instilled in you for so many years. That was the biggest struggle for me. So I bet, tell me about you. Was that also the same thing for you?
It was a little strange because I talk about the dumb things I did with the purpose of helping people. I say dumb things, but there's also other things that were just part of being alive, part of being human. That happened that I carried a little bit of shame around, which doesn't make sense. That just doesn't make sense. But because of, I think, the work environment and this idea that we have around I'll say, maladjusted idea, we have around professionalism, we somehow think that means we have to sterilize the human out of ourselves and that's not okay.
Now, in terms of the vulnerability, I'll tell stories of the mistakes that I've made because it helps me make a point in terms of helping somebody. I didn't know that was vulnerability, but people pointed out like Jess, how are you so vulnerable? I'm like I don't know what is that. And I was like, oh, it's like sharing the dirty details, right, Like the real things that we all experience, the things we feel, the things we believe. And I was like, oh, and if that's valuable and makes a deeper connection with people, which is my goal, then I just need to do it more and I need to do it on purpose, and so I would share. I would be vulnerable about the easy things, but when I discovered that it was powerful in terms of serving others, then I went, put that thing into overdrive and I was like let's go, let's tell, let's build all the details in service to others. And I think what I heard you say is the kind of the way you reconciled the thing was because it was helping other people.
Correct.
So I bet the L&M family right now is listening what the hell are they talking about. They keep talking around it. So, would you mind, are you okay with sharing, like what happened that 24 hour thing? And because I feel, rather I know, that was the launching point to the amazing life that you're living now.
Yeah, Correct, correct. I would have never Literally pursued the life that I'm living today. I wouldn't have it's not even it wasn't in my radar. But sure, let me walk you through what went down in 2016. I started experiencing just a lot of health issues, from back pain to constantly feeling nauseated out of the blue.
Completely could have been perfectly okay, and then, all of a sudden, I'm barfing over in a meeting by the way, it was really uncomfortable because I'm working through all of these challenges and I'm choosing not to say anything because, again my mind, if I'm a leader, it means I need to buckle everything I know, suppress everything that's going on, and I'm there to serve others, but not show my own weakness at all throughout this whole entire deal. As the days and weeks progress, and even years Progressed, I'm getting worse instead of getting any better, but I'm not saying anything. 2018 comes and I start the year in the hospital with the most horrific stomach pain that I had. I've never experienced anything like that. In mind, do I'm a mother of two? Oh, I had never experienced that kind of pain and I was literally Convinced that I was going to die from that horrific stomach pain.
In fact, we actually did communion in my room with my husband that day because we were convinced that I was going to be gone. It was that bad. They tried with over 20 milligrams of Morphine to calm the pain down. Wouldn't do, wouldn't even touch it. It was like giving me a Tylenol. And this is all intravenous medication. Nothing was touching in, so the surgeon is ready to cut. They think maybe I have some sort of obstruction. I don't have one. They're so puzzled, they're confused. They kept on saying your blood is telling me something, but I don't know what it is. And so many doctors and I'm talking about over 20 doctors involved in the process, trying to figure out what is going on with my room, martinez, and they can't get to the bottom of it. I'm in the hospital for seven days, jesse, and none of the doctors could Figure out what this picture was painting.
It was all over the board. It was a whole bunch of pain where I'm shaking, in the midst of medication going into my veins and I'm still it's not even touching it. I'm shaking, I'm barfing from the pain. I have the worst migraine I had ever experienced in my life. I'm literally feeling like I am dying and there was no solution. Seven days later, I'm starting to feel like back to normal human again. I'm released. I don't have a solution as to what actually happened in my body. We just knew that this episode happened and that I needed to have back surgery. They kept on telling me you need to have back surgery, you have a lot of referred pain. That's like the closest thing they could come up with so.
I agreed to submit myself to surgery, and this was April. By now it's April 2018.
That surgery actually weakened my immune system even more and that really caused a major crash in my Immune system and I started going down pretty fast. My finger started shaking. It looks like I was a Parkinson's patient and I'm literally 35 going like this and you can hear a lot of shaking in my voice. I'm a recruiter by trade. I recruit for a living. That means I talk for a living. I couldn't talk without sounding like I was gonna start crying If I saw a bottle. Could you imagine? I'm interviewing a Shaky and I had to actually have a disclaimer and say hey, jesse. By the way, if you hear me my voice shaking During the interview, I promise you I'm not getting emotional over the interview over your story.
It's something I'm dealing with medically. It was so uncomfortable but to not make the story such a long story because we'd be here for days I look really about it. What we ended up finding is that, instead of getting better, I kept on really getting worse. So now, at this point, everything for my upper extremities, from my belly button on up, I'm struggling. I'm experiencing not just the shaking, but now the tips of my fingers were actually going numb.
I felt like I was literally being electrocuted from my upper extremities all the way up to my neck, and I'm literally At this point. My voice is shaking, my head is shaking, my entire hands are shaking and Over time I'm starting to not actually have movement. My range, if my entire upper extremities are slowly going away, so can you imagine? It was like being trapped in your own body. No matter what I did, I couldn't get out of this. Illness is sickness. That was literally Grasping itself around me and I'm just watching my body just deteriorate. By the way, quick pause for a second. I'm going to work every single day. I'm not letting any of this stop me, except for when I am in the hospital.
But at this point.
It was just the beginning of the year and when I went to get the surgery for the back surgery. I'm literally coming out of the surgery and I'm closing a They've seen your VP position. I'm not crazy, so I literally nothing could stop me. While I'm still going through this major horrificness, I'm still working, so none of my co-workers, or even my bosses really knew all the specifics that I was dealing with not to the extent, and my direct boss did know, but no one else really knew the extent of how bad the situation was.
Yeah.
I'm sorry short. I actually there came a point in October where I could no longer move my entire arms. I was literally like this I could walk, but I started experiencing the same pins and needles sensation on my feet around November, end of November timeframe. I remember feeling this darkness like, oh my gosh, I know what's happening.
I know coming next, because now I knew I had already experienced the upper extremities. Now it's just a matter of time. Exactly so I feel the pins and needles sensation, the electrocuting. And here's the crazy part. I recruited electricians and my team recruited electricians for a living. I felt like I was being electrocuted day Irony, the sense of humor in the process of all the craziness that's happening in my life at this point. So I end up having the exact same issue on my lower extremities. At this point, and, not to bore you, but over a period of basically six weeks, I went fully paralyzed. I was in the office one day and I knew I just needed to get home because I am in so much pain. I'm conducting an interview when I know I should not even be in the office, but I'm committed. I'm a very committed person and when I say I'm gonna do something, I am going to do it, whatever it takes to get it done.
So I, I, I, I literally conducted that interview. Tears are rolling down and the person are you okay? And I'm like what's just allergies? I think everyone uses that line overused right.
I Hugged everyone goodbye. They hugged me because I couldn't lift my arms, but they hugged me. I said goodbye. I walked back to the car. It was more like a waddle. At that point, sure, I was still walk, but I couldn't walk. It was just more like a waddle. I got home, as I could and I was really fully paralyzed within hours. It was the scariest thing ever and that was just the beginning of If you thought that it was a nightmare what I had to shared with you.
That was just the beginning no worst that was happening, but that was about to come. So I actually passed out of my husband's arms. One day he says that he doesn't know what really happened. I passed out and all he knows that he had called 911. I woke up in the middle of the ambulance ride and I remember feeling scared. I remember being yeah.
Just out of this world, thinking this is something that happens in a movie. This is not supposed to happen. I mean, I was supposed to happen to people. I love what the heck is going on and I just remember praying and, jesse, I remember saying God, whatever is going to happen, just let my family be okay and make this go fast. At that point I was being, I was yes, yes, and that was not the end of it. Actually, I ended up getting to the hospital and At this point they think that it's nothing but mental. It's all up in my head. They're looking at the results Going your blood is completely all over the place, but we still don't understand what it's telling us, what's going on. But they had me see three psychiatrists to convince me that it was all up in my head.
Oh, okay.
Not up in my head the day they're getting ready to release me to go to a rehab facility so that I could work really hard. They thought if I could just work really hard to get back my Muscles and my nerves back to speed, that I would be fine. So the day that I'm getting ready to be released to go to an acute rehab facility, I start having issues with my throat. I have been telling them for three days up to this point, something is happening. I have feeling in my throat. Instead of going the right pipe, I feel like I'm choking. I feel like I'm dying. Every time that I eat. I don't want to eat anymore, but they kept on telling me you have to eat, you have to eat. So for three days the food instead of going into my belly, it was going into my lungs.
No, way oh.
The worst pneumonia you could possibly imagine yeah from going to rehab, leaving the hospital, I actually ended up in ICU, being intubated, in being given 24 hours to live. They told my husband. They were convinced that the damage was so severe. They attempted to go down with a camera into my lungs and they couldn't even come down. Plus was just so much in my bones. I was in their mind. I was a goner to God. I was not a goner yet. So he actually turned it around and I came out of the coma. And Once I came out of the coma, I had a whole outer body experience. It's a conversation that could take hours, but I knew that I was fighting for my life and I knew that if I wanted to stay, I needed to do something about it. It was like a flash before my eyes.
I saw my oldest daughter graduating college. She was in college at that time. I saw her graduating. I saw my youngest, who at that time was only 14. I saw her with her 15th birthday, which was a very big deal in our.
The King's Yaniera, and I just remember praying and saying I want to be there for all the events, I'm not okay with not being there. So I just remember throwing myself up on the ground and obviously this is all in my mind. But I remember throwing myself in praying pose, jesse, I just prayed and prayed until I felt heard. And once I felt heard I stopped praying and I looked back up. But it was incredible what had happened previously? Because before I started praying I had looked up and I saw this ginormous bright light. And when I looked up for the second time, once I was done praying, I took my hand. I saw the light and I took my hand and I did one of these to wave it off and say get out of here, I'm good. Yeah, it was gone. Wow, that light was gone. I believe and it sounds probably cuckoo crazy to the listener today, but I believe that day I was given a choice to pick between life or death, and I chose life.
Oh, my God, I'm getting chills just hearing that. Oh, wow, amazing. And thank you for sharing, because that I'm sure while you were living it, it wasn't some kind of oh, this'll be a cool story. It's a hell of a path to be down, and what stands out not just the miracle right, what you experienced and fought through and came through, or the doctors and everybody saying you just need to tough it out and get over it, it's in your head. What stands out is you kept working, yes, and I feel like you're a tenacious, assertive, accomplished woman making big change for yourself and for the people you serve. And I also feel like you would not advocate for the same behavior. If somebody else was ill and in the hospital or suffering anything, you wouldn't expect them to go close the deal like period Am.
I wrong, wrong? What was wrong? I look back and I ask myself what is wrong with me? What was wrong with me? I truly believe that I was given a second opportunity at life today, jesse, so that I could come back and help executives who have the same thinking, the same mentality, that it is our duty, it's our responsibility, it's our must to take care of others. In the name of servant leadership by the way, this is Sophie in the name of servant leadership, we take ourselves to the point where we are running in fumes, but yet we see this happen all the time. We tell ourselves that if we are the cell phone, we will go ahead and plug it in. As soon as we see that it's on dyno, we're gonna plug that battery in. We don't do that to our lives. Look at me. I was closing that deal, literally coming out of surgery. The guy that had actually learned that I was in the hospital. He's like whoa, no stop.
We're taking out the battery.
We're taking it out of the hospital and it was the candidate had to shun me in order for me to stop what I was doing. We do this to ourselves and this is terrible. It really is bad. We have to be better at taking care of ourselves in order for us to take care of others. What comes to mind is when you're flying, you hear from that stewardess saying put on your mask before you put it on for the person that's next to you, and I never understood that up until this situation happened Now. I know now that if I wouldn't have stopped to take care of myself in the way that I have been in the last two, three years now in my own, as my own boss, in my own business, I would have been the worst model for my girls, worst model for my daughters, and I never want that for myself and I never want that for any listener to give that type of example to their own loved ones. We're creating a trend when we do that and I'm very blessed that we were able to stop that with me with this situation Now, am I thankful for Porphyria?
Let me tell you that's what I ended up uncovering the doctors two years later. That's what they uncovered that I have. It's a gene that's broken, that doesn't allow me to make enough hemoglobin, and because of that I basically build up these horrible chemicals. You have them in your body too. I have them, but in my body they just go under the radar. My body doesn't know what to do with them, so they just get there and accumulate and then eventually they start attacking me In your body. Your body's smart enough. Your blood is smart enough to say oh, these chemicals are not good, let's get rid of them. It either gets rid of them like any other toxin or converts them into something good for your body. So am I thankful for this mess? You know what, as horrible as I wanna say, it's been horrible to me and I hate every bit of it. It's been a huge blessing and I'm actually really blessed to have it, even though I would not want it. It made me really create a whole 180 change that I'm grateful for.
Amazing. So you mentioned your girls. So they were 14, one was in college, so it wasn't like they were babies. They got to see the life that you were living. They got to see you struggle and go through this crisis, because it was a damn crisis. What's their response now? Seeing you live life the way you're living it now, which sounds like you're honoring yourself you're doing a better job of honoring yourself compared to before the situation. What do they have to say about it?
Oh my gosh, they're in awe. They're in awe watching the reality of how it should have been from the very beginning, because they did see a very successful person, a person who worked really hard to earn the first female VP position in that company. It was all exciting and wonderful, but they also knew that I didn't have the best balance and they always tried to get me to calm down and to relax and not be so aggressive. But I only have one speed is what I kept on telling them, and speed is usually on five and it doesn't know how to slow down. So none of them.
They have been part of the journey actually one of the things that I did, jesse, because I didn't know. I didn't know how to love myself, I didn't know how to take care of myself, I didn't know where to even begin. They have been part of the journey in helping me become a better person today, and I think it's freeing when you involve your children in the process and saying, look, I modeled this, which hasn't been all that negative, but there are some parts of that I'm not proud of and I don't want that for your life, so let me help you be a better person in this bad example that I've given you. I want to correct that, but you also have areas that you are really good at that I need help with. So help me in this area and it's been a huge. It's got us closer, really as a result of that.
Yeah, yeah. So I know that there's a lot of people out there that are still living that life. I didn't have a life-threatening situation. Mine was addiction and that was all self-imposed. But work was such a priority, my job was such a priority or whatever it was. My identity, whatever that identity was back then got all the focus and all the effort to the extent where it was a pallbearer and two family members few normals within a couple of years, and in both cases I went to the job site, unlocked everything, got the guys rolled up, got them set, went, did my duty as a pallbearer and then went back to the job site to make sure we finished the thing Right, you're not in your head, like that was.
I had a job to do right, I had things to do, I was gonna make things happen, and so maybe people aren't as extreme as you and I, but they are sacrificing a lot of the human experience for the sake of maintaining the appearance or being strong, because they're the only person to be strong, which I think is not true. It's just something that we tell ourselves.
We tell ourselves exactly, and it doesn't help when you're in an environment where that's expected. Yeah, it's almost. Don't have a life, don't have a life outside these walls.
Yes. So for somebody that's there and curious, like and you use the words you said that you didn't know how to love yourself, what are some recommendations you have for somebody that's in that current situation? They don't know how to honor or love themselves. What are some recommendations?
to get started, I Think the biggest thing is you need to identify what kind of life do you actually want to live? You need to decide the kind of life that you want and once you decide the kind of life that you want, start with the end in mind. Once you have that end in mind, backtrack into what you need to do in order to get there. For me, I needed to learn how to carve out time for myself, like going little things. By the way, I'm not talking about lavish vacations, going to Bali by myself. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about the easy things that you can do every single day, like prioritizing your sleep Key. If we could all have a better nightly routine, our days would be better as a result of us honoring the fact that we need, as humans, we need that sleep. We were meant to get some rest. We are not robots. And even your computer, by the way, if you don't plug it in and if you have to change it every couple of years three years Because it's not meant to live forever Yep, even a machine is not meant to live forever. So what makes us think that we can without that rest? So that's the first thing that I would tell a person. The second is in bed, some sort of system that allows you to just do some brain dump.
For me, I find that every single night I carve out 15 minutes. I don't go to sleep without just dumping everything into that piece of paper, and sometimes it's a pretty Like actual journaling, and there are many times that it's literally just that brain dump. That's it, because sometimes that's all I have the time to do, but the importance is to build a habit to be able to do and then, throughout the day, it really don't start your day by grabbing this thing, man, I'm telling you, the cell phone. It can be the greatest thing ever, but it's also the biggest piece rubber like it will steal your piece if you let it. Don't start your day by looking at social media first thing in the morning or work If you sleep with your phone right next to you.
I would change that. That's one of the things that I had to change. And today, by the way, I don't sleep with the phone in the same room. I I don't sleep in a complete different room, because it's the only way that I can actually function without my brain thinking oh, let me just go ahead and roll over and yeah you fit. You're not in your head like you are, so victim of that oftentimes.
Yeah when my phone, if I hear it buzz, I haven't put it in the other room, but I do have the like the night sleep. So like at after, I think, 9 pm, between 9 pm and 5 am, I won't get any phone call, any text, unless it's like I could I program, like my mom and my brothers, nobody else. The it's going straight to voicemail Because all it takes is me to pick if I get a text and I pick up the phone just to check the text. There's like, well, you know, let me check this and let me check that, and in an hour and a half is gone by me checking things that I don't. They're gonna be there in the morning.
Exactly. I actually again because I knew how. I had zero to no control over that, especially because as a recruiter you get Maybe it happens another, another industry stupid for me. I'll talk specifically to recruiting. You become addicted to. That person responded you want to get them on the phone, you want to place them at XYZ company and they responded they're interested in the candidate. So it never ends. It's not like at five you can shut off and you're completely done. I Found myself very similar to you one little ping and my attention goes there. Next to an hour later I'm still doing the same. So I had to engage both Wilson, my husband, and Jasmine, but youngest, who actually still lives at home with us, and say, if you catch me doing this, why I need you to stop me, and that's hard.
Yeah.
I'm someone else permission to tell you this or you need to stop doing this. That can be hard, but I knew that it was an area of weakness for me, so I had to ask engage as many people to help me stay accountable in that area. The other thing that I normally Today, I forced myself to do is to get in that daily exercise, and even if it's just a five minute walk I know some people are probably rolling their eyes. Going sounds easy. She's a business owner. She probably has somebody else to do that job for. Yeah, and you know what? It is a beauty that I have the ability to do that today. But I'm talking about it's a five minute walk. A five minute walk Anyone can embed that into their calendar.
Just the breeze or getting out of your own Environment. That or you're working every single day is such a game-changer If you're a leader, a manager, and you have people within your office, instead of doing a one-on-one Sitting at the desk if you don't need that computer, get up and walk around and actually have a walking meeting with someone. Or find a co-worker that can do a five minute walk with you during your break, or create a break even if you don't have one during your lunch break. Do something that allows you just to get fresh air. I know that's a huge for the mindset.
It's very important so what stands out to me is I know a bunch of us know a lot of really high-performing Professionals out there. We figure out how to overcome people problems. We figure out how to overcome budget problems, like we can figure out some big, gigantic things millions of dollars Serve tons and tons of people but we can't figure out how to take care of ourselves. The idea of taking five minutes to journal or walk or breathe or meditate is I've asked several people like can you find five minutes a day to just think? And it's come on like you figured out to do how to do all kinds of things, but you can't figure out how to take care of yourself. And I'm not saying that in judgment.
It was difficult for me, right like I got to a practice where I have an hour of thinking time every day. There aren't like today I haven't done it right because I had a gig and blah, blah, blah. But I Didn't start off at an hour, sister, I started off five minutes in a week and my therapist challenged me to do that. Right, can you get five minutes in a day? I said, girl, like I ain't got time for that. She said, how about in a week? I said, oh, I could do a week and then she said, okay, now do it twice in a week and then. So over the years I've worked my up to an hour.
So for the high performing, high, highly assertive LNM family member out there, you've accomplished so many things. How about you start figuring out how to accomplish honoring yourself now? I also want to be very clear. I want to help people understand it. It's not like you had this big event, right, they went viral. You got finally, thank the stars that you were diagnosed and they're at least it's not you being crazy Right, you have prafuria part being crazy, but not all just.
But it's not like you're just chilling at home. You've launched your own business that is thriving and growing. You have a growing online community and I don't mean followers, I mean like a community that you're serving people in the industry and you're serving in big ways, connecting people with careers. So you had all the reason in the world to say I was a high performing executive, first female VP in the organization. I had this life experience that I'm just gonna, I'm gonna, I can't do anymore, I'm just gonna put it in cruise control. And you did it. Why not?
actually, I went back to the corporate world after I came back from being an ICU. We learned how to do life all over again and I actually remember feeling like I was doing my company a disservice Because I was no longer performing at that level. I could no longer do 80 hours a week. I could no longer do the wake up at 5 am In order to get everything else done. So I knew I needed to do something different my life. So I actually I Took a day off. You asked where do you even begin honoring yourself? I took a day off and I just simply went. No computers, no cell phone, it was just me and a piece of paper. And I said okay, what does my rewind? And I knew I did not want to stay home. I knew I did not want to just simply sit back and collect disability. I wanted to really make a difference in the electrical industry.
So, I was not motivated by money, but money has never been a motivator for me. So I started M squared talent solutions and it was a huge undertaking. Because now I had a challenge of I can't work the hours a crazy hours that I was working when I was healthy. Now I literally have to rest after so many conversations. Talking is the same. It's literally the equivalent of running for me, because I've really damaged lungs after being an ventilator and my weakness it's still there. So I literally had to look back and decide what do I really want at the end of the day? And I really want to impact the electrical industry. So I started M squared talent solutions.
I have an incredible husband and with his support we were able to. In the first year we never saw a dip. We saw the company just do this in no time. We were a group of 12. First year wasn't even a first complete year when we were a huge team. So, yeah, I've been at, I would say, probably the most abnormal Of taking a huge challenge like this and saying you know what? Or all up the sleeves and let's get to work. But that has helped me, but it goes with my personality too, jesse it's, and I'm so beyond glad that I found lands and through lands we connected, because one thing that I will say is that it's an entrepreneur. You cannot do Do life alone. You know other people, you need a community, you need others to help, be able to Keep you encouraged, because there are so many days that it's up on top of the world in the very days I'm like oh, why am I doing this?
When you look at the individuals that you have helped along the way. We've helped over hundred Electrical professionals get out of their really sucky cultures and environments where they were at feeling like the old Myra, where they were not allowed to even think about themselves as humans. They were just machine, were a number, but they needed to reach XYZ in order for them to earn their keep now.
They're happy, they're in a much better environment, and that's really, for me, the idea of this creating an electrical community. You reference the community. It's something that was born Through connecting with other electrical professionals who shared my vision to do something for the Industry so that when we're long gone, they can look back and say we have a place because these people were willing to put in the time and the energy. We get nothing from it. What we get is just to see that there's a place for people to talk about the critical things that the industry really needs, the issues that many people ignore.
Construction does a really good job. You mentioned it. We have so many bright people that have helped us how to figure it out, building information, modeling. We can do so many things that we were not able to do before. We're not Installing the exact same way that we were installing 50 years ago, because people are smarter and brighter in so many ways and bring in processes, but we're still treating ourselves like we're just a machine.
I really do believe that we Electively, as leaders who have experienced this brighter awakening, that it all starts with us and the better we take care of ourselves, we can help others. I really do believe that we're on to something huge, and Hopefully Gen Z will be able to pick up a lot of these things and not experience being held back from them taking care of themselves the way that we were, because now we can do a better job of modeling it. Yeah, not only that, it should be like to take care of yourself in all fronts, not just Professionally, in reaching that corporate ladder. We do such a good job at chasing it and achieving it. Oftentimes but you said it best the cost that goes along with that is Bigger than what we most likely should be willing to pay oftentimes. Believe me, if I would have known that, my hunger for success to become the first female VP would have ended with near death and jeopardizing my family. That was. That was unfair.
It was unfair and Irresponsible for me to do that for my daughter's sake, for my husband's sake. He's got a ministry. He would have been pastoring without a wife because I was so hungry for the next corporate ladder.
Now that's a question. It wasn't always in my head, but now it is. At what cost? I get nescio right, I want to go try new things, test new things, and I had several people, but that one one of my mentors straight up Tell Jesse, you can have everything, you just can't have it all right now.
All right, pick one or two things at a time, yet you can do it all. You're trying to do it all right now and you're killing yourself like we. Just we do a poor job of honoring ourselves. So for me, I have to ask myself okay, yes, I can do those things. I'm gonna add another thing to my plate. At what cost? What do I have to sacrifice? What am I going to? Who am I going to under serve? Because I want? I have this weird need to do this other thing and then it's okay, I don't really need it right now. I can pause now. Two things I want to pick on one. This is for the LNM family. If you didn't hear it Multiple examples you shared of how you've overcome the thing and how you've done your transition, built your amazing business and taking care of yourself now, which I think is the biggest accomplishment.
Yes is Resources. You tapped into your daughters, you tapped into your family and gave them permission to tell me hey, it's to put your phone away, don't be using your phone. You made a promise. You have your network, your community within the world. Now that is digital, we can access. You lean into people.
So if you want to take better care of yourself, what I heard you saying what I learned is I have to invite people to speak into my life and I have to let them have to receive that. So if you don't like folks out there in the omniverse, if you're not letting people in, start there. That's hard. That was super, super hard for me. I'm very social, but that don't mean I trust you Right now. Here's I don't know if this is a point or a question, but you talked about that one day. You took off and Got that blank sheet of paper to write down what you wanted and it reminded me of the life that I was living before, even though I was chasing all the things right, the promotions and the three bedroom to car to garage, truck, car, vacation like all of that I was. It was like I was living a script written by somebody else For somebody else, but I was living it. That's good. I never thought about what do I want this to be. Do you think that's a common thing? Maybe?
oh, absolutely, absolutely. I think a lot of times we're put on a program that we think we want, but are we even asking ourselves if that's really truly what we want? I tell you what, if I wouldn't have taken that day off which, by the way, that day is the day that I wrote down the date that I was going to resign, and I stuck to the date and I brought it to my husband, I said hold me accountable, this is date I will resign. And I'm moving on. And by telling him, I knew I was making a commitment that it was going to happen. But that was the day to me that I was starting to begin to live my life. That was the first day that my room was going to live the life that I truly wanted. Not the program that I had been put on Many years ago from growing see, for me it was growing up in the middle of El Salvador, in the middle of Civil War.
I thought that success was corporate. I had some Definitive, I had something where it was consistent. I was not wondering where the next paycheck was going to come from and I felt like I was making those around me really proud. Right, that's great and all, but I was doing it in such a way that it was harming my body so much in my mind. Let's not forget, our mind is oftentimes overlooked as a result of that. But that is so critical, jesse, being able to look internally and say okay, who's program am I really on and I'm really living the life that I really want. Now, today, I say that I'm living a life that I've never dreamed, because it wasn't what I wanted at the beginning. But now I'm so grateful that this whole journey Happened to me so that I would be awoken at least enough for me to realize I Needed to live a different life. And now, today, for the first time, I'm actually on the driver's seat.
Yeah, I love it. That's what was most excited to have this conversation. We were to share it with the world. Because you're living a life now. You're living your life by design, by your design or and I want people to hear that because I know I did, and a lot of us still are living a life by default, which is that program that somebody else told us sold us on, and for me, what it felt like was discontent, dissatisfaction, disappoint, like all the d's. It was just. It was like what's the point? I'm here, so what is this? It? And then I have similar question, like for me it was what is the promise? You are intended to be right. So I got the one big closing question, which I think is gonna be beautiful for me who is the target Audience, who's gonna get the most out of joining this community that you're building in the trip?
part of so this is strictly for electrical professionals. I only work in the electrical space. It's really my background. I worked with two of the largest Non union electrical contractors and that's how I got my start in this construction space. So really it's for electrical professionals, those individuals that want to be able to learn from one another, network and continuously level up, that is the most ideal forum. It's a free community. It allows you to be able to like linkedin I'm off linkedin for you are only talking to other electrical professionals and there's, there are coaches in there that are willing to donate their time, their energy to help people. Just constantly Be reminded that what we are doing is for ourselves and for our families, not necessarily just for the business, which is great when you can. Just a perfect balance. We're attempting to really bring in that balance into that community.
Nice? And if they were interested, how would they get connected with that community?
the fastest and easiest way would be to do and Hi fan squared coaching dot com, and there's a spot right there to check out the checkout page that allows you to join the community, and it's free.
Will make sure we get that link. I'll have the link in the show notes of my own. Mess it up, amazing, super. Thank you for sharing that, because I think we are community is a powerful thing. It's easy to think that you're suffering alone, but being a part of a community, and a very curated community that you have what help people understand like you're not alone.
We're all experiencing the same thing, so I'm not doing that, people to also learn that it is okay to be vulnerable, specially men, but very difficult for men to understand that it is a okay. We have, for example, next week in the community we have one individual that I will be interviewing. He's a young father. He's only Twenty seven years old oh yeah, father, and he just as an electrician. He promised himself that he would never Ever follow his father footsteps and be an absent father so he's coming in talking to the community.
what are some of the things that he does to keep balance, so that he never forgets how to be there constantly for his son? That's what I believe will outlive me when I'm on just creating that legacy where we have better electricians, better leaders, better managers but, most importantly, better fathers and mothers yeah that's a legacy I want to leave behind.
Oh my god, that's amazing. Oh, perfect segway, so might. What is the promise you are intended to be?
the promise I am intended to be. That's a very deep question, my friend. I really believe that I exist to help electrical professionals Find meaningful lives, not just go through the status quo, but live meaningful lives, whether that's through consistently showcasing my own journey, my story, the things that I do which, by the way, I also have a newsletter where I share a lot of this stuff every single monday, because I do believe that we all go through experiences that can help another individual, and I pour my heart out every single monday On those newsletters. But I really do believe that I went through this, so someone else doesn't have to, and my promise of my exist is to help those electrical professionals find meaningful lives.
I love that so precise. I'm jealous that you're amazing. You're amazing, right? So any folks you want to give a shout out to oh my gosh, I want to shout out to you first.
You are amazing. I really appreciate the fact that you embrace me into your community, gen. I love her personality, even though we really have not spent quality time one on one. But I feel like I know her, and that's one of the things that I really have enjoyed about Building a community with you and the rest of the family here is that we're not alone. We do not have to do life alone, and it's so much sweeter, so much better when you are in a group of people that have the same Thoughts and ideas, are like minded, are pushing in the same direction. They will hold you accountable as well.
Shout out to Lance, my friend for a young, who is just constantly, I feel like, looking out for me in the community as well, and everyone else in my team wilson, who is not just an incredible husband but also the best managing partner to m square talent solutions, and the rest of the team that's helping me build the Overall electrical community. I'm beyond grateful for Irene, while Garcia, for Sergio Cortez at land's just has just joined our community as well. I'm excited for those individuals that See this vision as not too crazy and lofty that they can get behind it. They get excited to see that we're building something that will definitely outlive us and I encourage anyone that wants to follow the story along. You can actually see if you want to see some actual footage of my road learning how to walk all over again.
By the way, I have hashtag my god beats porphyria. Perferia is a very difficult word to spell, so I'll send you the spelling so you can send that hashtag in the bottom, but it's hashtag my god beat perferia. You can see the whole entire journey and you'll see why. The first person I said shout out to wilson as well, because he really has been an incredible person, from a coach to nutritionist to a show for whenever I needed it like. He's absolutely everything you'll see throughout those videos him Helping me really learn how to do life over again. But this was wonderful. Thank you for inviting me to come in and have this conversation with you.
My thank you. You are a rockstar and the world is gonna love you and learn from everything you shared. Thank you, ma'am.
Here are some great episodes to start with.